Happy Birthday to me!

Almost over

I was right to be optimistic in my last post. I ended up getting a 96 in my calc exam. Best result EVER in a maths class. Doubt I will repeat this exploit however.

One last exam before my birthday (well, it is *on* my birthday), and the holidays. I should be excited but somehow, I feel extremely apathetic. I'm worried that my lack of interest in anything (even food, if I'm being honest here) might not be related with school, because frankly, I'm not excited about Christmas. At all. And it's my favourite holiday.

Neither do I seem to care about my birthday (although I've always been fussy about birthdays. I hate getting older, and besides, I haven't properly celebrated in a few years because it's always smack dab in the middle of Finals... do your kids a favour, don't have them Mid-December, it sucks.).

Eh. The only thing I look forward to is leaving for another country next year. And my trip to the Sunshine state next summer.

Guess I'm just not myself anymore. Looking at pictures from a few months ago, I'm a completely different person now. As in, my face doesn't even look the same anymore.

I'm not unhappy though. Neither am I depressed. I'm just. I don't know. I feel like I couldn't care less about anything. Even shopping doesn't get me excited (although that, my wallet is thankful for). Yawn. And the insomnia is back. Not sure why though.

So much for a happy post. Let's end on a positive note though. I did something rash and cunning earlier today. It involves a pretty boy that I have never *officially* met, but who is friends with a friend of mine. And he's most definitely not Canadian.... :)

Optimism?

Found right next to my apartment building, as I was getting in earlier today. Probably a sign from above that I need to stop torturing myself, right?

Or maybe it just means I'll go to NYC soon !

Overbooked & overworked

No but seriously, what is it with November 3 & 4 ? I have been invited to / have to go to about 15 different activities that are held on these two days. Why on earth would everyone pick THOSE exact dates? Seriously? A Tuesday & a Wednesday???

I'm kind of starting to panic. Leafing through my planner, with the exams coming up... Well let's just say it's not looking good. I should learn to say no. I already have four classes, and out of these, 2 of my teachers are effing INSANE giving us this incredible workload (and I'm used to writing papers and studying for exams... never have I ever had so much work....). I'm barely keeping up.

Plus driving classes. That's like an extra 2 hours a week. Plus 4-hour practices a week for a special academic/sports/social event coming up this winter (which I can't really discuss right now). Plus involvment in financing said event. Plus dance class and cardio workout (2 hours a week). Plus board meetings (3h every 2 weeks). Also, I'm playing godmother to 2 foreign students. And let's not forget the shitload of homework my teachers take pleasure in giving us.


And now? On top of all that? Mentorship. Because OBVIOUSLY I didn't have enough on my plate as it is! I mean, I'm really excited about that program, but it's just BAD timing. Shit.

I'm trying to do everything at once and I'm sort of realizing that you can't be good at everything. There isn't always enough time to do it all. In life, you have to choose.

And I suck at making choices.

Atchoo!

I'm so sick of sneezing and having to blow my nose every 30 seconds!!!

Let it snow!

It's snowing again :) or should I say, it hasn't stopped since this morning!

Everything is white outside, it's lovely ♥

I'd love to go out and build a snowman, but with this nasty cold I caught, it'd be ill-advised. Thankfully it isn't the swine flu!

I find it so weird that this is the 3rd "storm" we get before Halloween. Must be global warming. Ironic as it sounds, it's probably true. Global warming = more snow & more rain for us poor Quebecers! But hey, maybe we'll beat Forks as the rainiest place on earth and attract bloodsuckers on our land....

JUST KIDDING! I've just been subjected to a bunch of Twilight stans this week and it seems to have addled my brains :/

Ok, back to algebra :(

Fall Break? Huh?

Supposedly, this week is fall break. No school all week. All play, no work. Supposedly.

Let's just say I'm in over my head and will spend the week indoors (poo, it's so nice outside... sunny and crisp. perfect fall day <3), writing papers and studying for upcoming exams. Oh, the joy!

Also, still trying to come up with a decent Halloween costume for a party next Saturday. Absolutely uninspired this year. I want something funny or cute, or recognizable... but not slutty, that's just not me. Ideas anyone? Maybe I should consider something spooky... after all, the party is held in a CHURCH, of all places!!

Ah, wish I had more time for my friends this week (like L, S, F, C and C, who I've been neglecting quite a bit lately), but it will have to wait...

Shocker

I had no idea. This is just WAY too much.

I don't know why I'm making such a big deal out of it though. After all, they're not the first couple I know who get married so young.

I HATE YOU, L (even though you probably won't read this... but you know already anyway as I have verbally assaulted you!!!) !!!!

Seriously, I should never believe a word that comes out of that crazy girl's mouth. She was only pulling my leg about getting married!!!

God I hate that girl sometimes!

Algebra and other dilemmas

I have been so busy with school and social activities that I have neglected this blog... !

I think I understand now, that is to say, a little over 12 hours before my calculus exam, and 72 hours to go before the algebra one, why I dislike maths so much. I mean, I get it, the whole how-to-solve-problems, and with a lot of practice, I can usually teach myself to do it, and learn the whole process.

The problem lies deeper within. I dislike maths because I do not UNDERSTAND them. I can do them, but I don't understand what they mean, and where formulas come from.

That's just how I learn. I'm much better at things I actually understand, than at things I have to memorize (although I'm good at that) or to apply.

The week from hell is coming up, and as with every exams week, drama always follows. It's like I have been cursed. Every single exams week, something MAJOR happens. Or a lot of semi-major things. Never the week before or the weeks after exams... nope, it's always DURING/right before that dreaded week.... I have rotten luck!

Ghosts from the past popping up, my almost roommate bursting into my apartment in TEARS over her relationship, a very good friend stuck between lust (another girl) and love (her boyfriend), a potential job offer... and finding out I have gotten screwed by my university (yet again... seems I'm quite unlucky when it comes to bureaucracy... I mean, they even managed to mess up my Bachelor's degree diploma...

This evening was especially eventful, so much so that I had a panic attack on top of it all. It's going to be a LONG week...

Calculus rhymes with octopus

I was expecting much, much worse. My first day of school wasn't so bad after all. To top it off, I saw plenty of cute boys dressed up as leprechauns, Flinstones, bananas, you name it. Too bad these kids are too young for me! Technically, I am aware that they're not really kids, but I swear they're getting younger every year! I saw new students who looked like 12-year-olds! It's almost creepy, some of these girls look downright prepubescent!


I have a good feeling about things, so far. I dreaded Calculus but it turned out to be alright, even easy. Of course, we're doing a recap on high school stuff for the next 2 weeks but STILL, I was able to solve and understand EVERYTHING without really even making an effort. Coming from someone who hasn't done much maths-related in 5 years? That's impressive. Whew. Maybe I'm not as math-illiterate as I thought?

I am raging

To my displeasure, I realized that not only did I end up dating a dirtbag, said piece of trash has managed to ruin things for me. Plenty of people who absolutely do not know me currently hate me. Jealousy? Or whatever else? I have no idea.

Word on the street is, I'm a bitch. An ex of his has even gone as far as making freaking death threats. What is wrong with people? Is a failing relationship worth all this drama?

I have a feeling I'm not done with ex issues. I need a normal, regular boyfriend. In the future. Like, a WHILE from now. I'm still creeped out about my "summer fling".

Apparently this town is not big enough.

I'm starting to become extremely jaded. I'm thinking of retiring from dating. It's too complicated. I think North Americans are too hard to understand. From my perspective, Europeans seem more balanced. Obviously there are some exceptions, but culturally, I have a feeling I'd be better off dating on the other side of the pond. *If* I get back into it. Let's just say I'm done for a while.

And to top it all of, my *v* key is broken. How annoying.

Jolly good

I'm so tired I'm drunk. Although I am a little teensy bit tipsy. Probably why I find the following image extremely amusing... I'm a huge huge Fringe fan too, that surely explains it ;)

Today was a VERY boring day at work (involved lots of paperwork...), but I'm definitely going to miss seeing the gang everyday, it's such a funny :) Can't believe I have 1½ days left working there. And then maybe, maybe, I'll be back for a bit during the school year; I can only cross my fingers and hope for the best!

Ok, so, I probably had too much wine. Oops.

Oh well hey, my sister just crashed with a bunch of her friends. Looks like it'll be a loooongggg day tomorrow hehe.

Also, found out that one of my guy friends found a new roommate. From what I can tell, he looks like a major cutie... ! Ok, I sound like a silly, giggly 12-year-old.

Anddddd I dumped/got dumped unceremoniously by boring guy. Eh. I think he's mad at me, but really, if he wanted to talk to me so badly, he could've picked up the phone and called. Besides, he was a bad kisser. We all know bad kissing leads to bad sex, and an even worse relationship. Not that we were officially dating, just... you know. Seeing each other. I'm kind of glad we're through, he was starting to get on my last nerve.

Speaking of Miami

Wish I were there (again).

Sunday Night Blues

I hate late Sunday nights, knowing I will not be able to fall asleep for a while, yet also aware that getting up super early is gonna be HARD. I can never get to bed :(

Nevertheless, today was fun. I spent most of the afternoon by the pool with friends (who also happen to be my neighbours... we live in the same "community"). It was so hot and humid that I believe I spent more time in the water than out!!

I then went a little crazy after that, making dinner for myself. The heat was unbearable in my appartment, yet I decided I was up for a little cooking. Pretty darn stupid if I may so myself: I had to take a cold shower afterwards.... ! But it was worth it. I tried something new. Maple syrup scallops. Just thought it would be good together. And boy was I right.... it was absolutely delicious!

I even drank a can of Diet Pepsi, which is something I NEVER do. I don't really care for soda, plus I hate Pepsi. I'd much rather drink Coke (Pepsi feels too sickeningly sweet for my taste). Alas, it was all I had on hand, and I was really craving something COLD to help me make it through the night!

I had dinner watching Miami Social... I'm really starting to get into that show, and I don't care how trashy it is. It's a fun, 'guilty pleasure' kind of entertainement. And frankly, it's not that over the top. Unlike NYC Prep. But I still watch it anyway, hehe. Pathetic, I know ;) Which reminds me, if you see episode 8 floating around, can you please let me know? I can't find it anywhere...

My Life According to Oasis

Just because I'm bored :) stolen from a friend on Facebook.

RULES: Using only song names from ONE ARTIST, cleverly answer these questions. Pass it on to a bunch of people including me. You can't use the band I used. Try not to repeat a song title. It's a lot harder than you think!

Pick Your Artist:
Oasis (favourite band... ever)

1. Are you a male or female?
"The Girl in the Dirty Shirt" (also happens to be my favourite song)

2. Describe yourself:
"I Hope, I Think, I Know"

3. How do you feel:
"Roll With It"

4. Describe where you currently live:
"Half the World Away"

5. If you could go anywhere, where would you go:
"All Around the World"

6. Your favorite form of transportation:
"Gas Panic!"

7. Your best friend:
"She's Electric"

8. Your favorite color is:
"Champagne Supernova"

9. What's the weather like:
"Turn Up the Sun"

10. Favorite time of day:
"Morning Glory"

11. If your life was a tv show, what would it be called:
"Shakermaker"

12. What is life to you:
"Magic Pie"

13. Your current relationship:
"Going Nowhere"

14. Looking for:
"Rock 'N' Roll Star"

15. Wouldn’t mind:
"Fuckin' in the Bushes" (tee-hee!)

16. Your fear:
"Part of the Queue"

17. What is the best advice you have to give:
"Love Like a Bomb"

18. If you could change your name, you would change it to:
"Lyla"

19. Thought for the Day:
"Stay Young"

20. How I would like to die:
"Live Forever"

21. My motto:
"Keep the Dream Alive"

New beginnings

I figured it was about time that I made my own blog. I had one with a friend, but I'm not so sure where we stand now, ergo it might be best that I fly solo for a bit.

It's time to reflect on these past few months, and to move forward with new plans and new dreams. Summer is almost coming to a close, but ironically, it is also just starting. The sun finally decided to come out. Sigh... Life is always full of contradictions (especially mine, as you might discover if you stick with me for a bit).

Speaking of, it's been a strange week.

A very special friend died, last Sunday. I still can't wrap my mind around it, and I feel like it's been months already. How time flies by. It's been 2 weeks since Florida. I miss it already (despite the insane heat).

In fact, I miss living abroad so, so much. A year ago, I was getting ready to leave for France. So much has happened since then. Two (well, three, technically) breakups. Falling outs. New friends. Old friends. Memories.

And now, it's as though I'm bored with my life here. Despite the fact that I'm starting my Master's in just two short weeks. Ouch. Still don't know what I want to do with myself.

I'm thirsty for adventure. Bring it on!

Photo by Tim Walker